Well, one thing is I stayed off social media. I just read books and watched movies.
I avoided the negativity of people. Honestly, I think this negative attitude to other people’s ideas, opinions and art created an overwhelming sense of self doubt.
So, I’m back to feeling some desire to write again. I want to tell my stories. Perhaps they won’t be any good. Maybe no one will ever read it. Yet, I will complete them. I think thats the attitude I need and hopefully I can keep the faith restored….
On January first, I wanted to write on this blog every day for an entire year. As anyone paying attention (not sure there’s many) but that’s not happened.
Several factors have influenced this: internal conflicts of do I share opinions or touch on uncomfortable subjects, or simply share memories and reminisce about things I love; battling writers block on a couple projects that have diminished my desire to write; and, working through my fixation of my obsessive need for refinement (an oxymoronic statement I’m sure) and my never ending worry with having order in my process of work.
If the last reason doesn’t make sense, it’s probably because I don’t know how to make sense of my mind sometimes. There’s definitely something not right when I worry about every word. I immediately want to take it back. I should have said that differently or the anxiety of judgment due in part to the manner in which I talk or think.
So I failed but I still want to move forward. Confronting weakness or mistakes is the first step, right? Then again maybe artists don’t fire on all thrusters and I need to accept that. I’ll work on it. But realistically, I just want to tell stories….
I’ve always been intrigued by how people can exaggerate an outcome from a statement and completely come up with a ridiculous verdict that wasn’t even hinted at in the original statement. Let me provide an example:
Someone at a dinner states, “I try and donate $100 a month to my local animal shelter.”
The person-across-the-table returns, “So you condone animal murder!”
Now my first thought, where in the heck did this conclusion come from? I mean the person across the table took a typical good thing and turned it into massive negative. The look of surprise on my face is:
Thus, the kind and gentle heart that decided to donate to an animal shelter has to ask follow up questions. “Why is that?” The person-across-the-table heatedly replied, “because that shelter is NOT a no-kill shelter!”
Wait! So, a charitable donation, that helps feed and keep animals safe, is now a completely bad thing. The person is now judged as completely vile and immoral person while doing something good? WHAT KIND OF INSANITY IS THIS?
But, this is actually a diagnosis symptom. Yes, if someone you know does this, then they have been infected by the SJW-virus – causing normal people to spit out these outrageous responses. Do not be alarmed. It’s okay to confront the disorder and tell the person they need help. If we work together, we can battle this disease and return society back to normal.
Thank you for your support. Knowing, is half the battle. And, MORE YOU KNOW!